🎟️ MEMBERSHIP CHECK
Presenting credentials...
⚖️
THE TRIBUNAL
Justice, served ice cold, by majority rule
File Charges
The Accused
The Crime
Charges summon every member's phone to vote. Guilty verdicts spin the Sentence Wheel. All verdicts are entered into the permanent record.
🔮
ORACLE OF LARD
A prediction market for degenerates
Open a Market
Stake (points, paid by/to GOD)
Everyone locks a pick. When truth reveals itself, the market's creator (or the Ham Handler) settles it: right pickers win the stake from GOD, wrong pickers pay it.
🐷
PIG ROULETTE
Six pigs. One squeals. Loser drinks.
Tap a pig to claim it (tap again to cycle owners). Then pull the trigger.
🕵️
SECRET SWINE
Your daily covert mission. Tell no one.
💸
DRINK DEBT LEDGER
Debts double hourly (clock sleeps 10PM–9AM). 24-gulp mercy ceiling.
The Full Ledger
Auditing the books...
Interest: every debt DOUBLES per awake hour — the clock runs 9AM–10PM and sleeps overnight. The House mercifully caps any tab at 24 gulps. Drink promptly.